We make choices everyday. Sometimes, we make very good choices. Some others we don’t. And when the latter happens, we just have to deal with its consequences and deal what we have at the moment.
This morning supposedly started earlier as she has requested before sleeping for me to wake her up so she can finish up her homework. Yes, I hear you. There was weekend. (I nodding my head now).
Actually, the homework was given Wednesday. Thursday was declared a holiday. And Friday is no academic class day. She felt she could leave it off for the weekend. Weekend came, and she kept begging off with alibis. I reminded her over and over. She felt cool with her choice.
Sunday night at dinner, I had a talk with her about how she acts out when I get my phone and how she excuses herself from other tasks. I reminded her of her undone homework too. I reminded her that her foremost occupation being a school-aged kid was to learn and do her schoolwork. Next was to help around with her chore share. The rest of her time was hers for recreation and leisure. She told me that she promises to borrow and play with my phone only on weekends and will welcome my punishments if she does not keep her bargain. She was prouder to say she loves my punishments because it shows her consequences and she learns. I just said, ok.
Then this morning happened. She’s late for her usual departure time. She hadn’t had breakfast, her homework unfinished. She was crying. I asked why.
BunnyMunchkin (BM): I’ll be late and my homework isn’t finished.
I pointed it was a natural consequence of her choices despite having been constantly reminded.
She started crying more. I was about to say more when she asked me not to speak. As if asking that her mistakes not be further rubbed. I motioned zipping my mouth. And stood from the table to wash the plates and cups we used. She ran to me asking for a hug.
BM: I shouldn’t have played with your phone too long.
Me: It’s done. You cannot undo it now.
BM: I’ll be late and that I have not completed the home work.
Me: Well then, what can be done now.
BM: Can I just put a question mark on what I did not finish.
Me: You can. Or you can also leave it blank. If time becomes available, say you finished on a task earlier before the class with home work, ask permission to do something else – your home work.
She went on pack her bag still sobbing worried about her homework. She was also so worried now about being late.
BM: It’s ok to be late, right? Than be absent.
Me: Yes. It’s OK. You are not usually late. And it’s always better to show up than not to. Just tell your teacher why you’re late.
She was about to lament more on her home work. I interuppted and said. It was OK too. It is a lesson learned. We just have to move along and do what best we can. Go to school. If the homework can be completed before due time do it. If the effort is late just charge it to experience. We make wrong choices and we accept its consequences.
After school, she arrived home happy to announce that she managed to keep her spot in class for the first grading.I was happy for her too. But I had to ask about the homework. She said their teacher said he will still check their homeworks despite many of them not putting it on their notebooks as instructed. She only answered on her book too. She was happy to be spared of her worries.
Her lesson as she said: She will do her homeworks and readings first. It was also a waste of time crying and acting out this morning, worrying about her tardiness and homework. (She arrived in school late for the flag ceremony but not for the class. The homework was accepted.) She realized how it could have also affected her day if she focused too much on it. She said she had a great day despite the not good start. Worrying was not worth the time. Thankful too for friends who spent a great school day with her.
Note: The transcript is a lot calm-looking than what we had this morning.